We often use a bunch of feelings and emotions to express ourselves. Sometimes we express too much and regret it afterwards.
Feelings and emotions are part of the language of the soul. Both make us feel active and alive. Imagine a person without them? It would be hard to know what they were thinking and even harder to relate to them. So whilst feelings and emotions are both important expressions of the soul, we need to learn to manage them, otherwise they will manage us!
Feelings are the natural state of the soul. They arise instinctively and are expressed without any filters. E-motions, on the other hand, are often called energy in motion. They are not always in our control, and negative feelings can give rise to a negative outburst of emotion such as anger or blame.
Behind every negative emotion is embedded a belief. For example: If I am very hungry and the food is not ready, there is the belief that it should have been ready for me, or by now. If the husband forgot to bring flowers, the belief is that he should have remembered. If children do not behave in a certain way, the belief is that they should be more sensible and mannered.
More than just an expectation, a belief goes much deeper. We carry these beliefs around with us all the time. They govern the way we live our life. Our beliefs determine what we expect from life, and if we don’t get what we expect, or believe that we deserve, we may experience disappointment or anger. Because we totally believe in our belief, we will fight for it, argue about it, and feel that it is our right to have things the way our belief says we should.
The attitude of ‘I deserve’ can come from ego, or from a sense of self-respect. In the sense of self-respect, I deserve because I am worthy of receiving it, and in the sense of ego, I deserve because you should give it to me.
Next time you feel bad, check what the belief is that you are protecting, and where it is coming from. Come into witness mode and observe. What is the understanding (or should we say misunderstanding J) in the soul that is not allowing me to accept the current situation the way it is?
When I am stuck in a belief, I refuse to see things in any other way. Are beliefs not the cause of many a war in our world? “I know”, “I am right”, “Ours is the most powerful nation”. OK, let’s take it for granted that we will have beliefs, then I also need to understand that others will have theirs too! And so when one belief clashes with another, there is world war three, because each one is trying to convert the other to their belief.
Anger and ego do not arise when we sit in meditation. They arise when we are in action, or we are remembering an event. That is not to say that we need not be in action. In fact the whole challenge of our life is to learn to be in action, but to be free from the web of such emotions.
We can do this when we become aware of our feelings. When we become the observer of our feelings we can then be in control and choose our response. Then instead of an outburst of emotion, we will be able to experience more peace, calm and a sense of being in control of our lives.
It’s time… to be in witness mode, and then come into action, with the belief that all is good and all will be for the best.
© ‘It’s Time…’ by Aruna Ladva, BK Publications London, UK