We worry over so many things, when, more often than not our worries are not justified. Have you noticed that children don’t seem to worry a lot? When did we lose our innocence, that carefree attitude? Over-worrying can become a sickness if we don’t take care. It is one thing to be a good planner, to manage risks and be meticulous, but quite another to be a worrier about every tiny detail of life.
The main reason most of us worry is out of insecurity: we worry we may lose our job; our children may get out of our control; we may put on more weight; we might have an accident, the list is endless! How many of our worries really come to pass? Very few!
If you can do something about the thing you are worrying about, then do it! If you can’t, then no point worrying is there?
Worrying is in fact a waste of our powerful thought energy, as well as a bunch of other valuable resources such as our time and physical energy. When our mind is actively engaged in worrying then our whole physical body is stressed also. Our breathing becomes faster. Heart starts to pump more blood. Muscles begin to tense up. The fight or flight syndrome can kick in very easily; one thought of worry is enough!
As the mind gets caught in myriad of scenarios of ‘what if…’, this opens the door to many evils. There is no end to the number of things that we could be worrying about all day.
Let’s take the example of flying. When you are about to board a flight, you might think of a million things that can go wrong. The movie Castaway may come to your mind. Your mind may entertain the possibility of a terrorist attack for a few minutes, or the pilot having a heart attack and dying, and then, Oh No! What if something happens to the co-pilot! …Maybe the engineers didn’t do a thorough check of the plane and one of its engines is faulty and going to fail…! As I mentioned the reasons to worry are plenty if we allow our mind to go there!
And while we were worrying, we missed the NOW moment! We missed meeting the lovely people and perhaps even the drinks that went by, the smile of the stewardesses, the beautiful view down below and catching the sight of those pure cotton-like clouds!
It has been said that fear is an acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real. Most of our worries are futile and there is probably a one in a million (or even a billion, depending on our imagination!) chance of them happening. It’s not real!
If we worry, it is mostly because we are insecure inside and not necessarily because the outside circumstances are unsafe or insecure! All worry begins in the mind with the misuse of our imagination. Mostly it is out of habit too! The ego likes to believe it has everything figured out. So in an attempt to cover all grounds of possible failure, it begins to worry in order to protect itself.
Let us look at a case of a genuine worry or concern, such as worrying about your kids going drugs. Instead of worrying, having extra thoughts and panicking, ask yourself the question, what can I do about it? And then take the necessary action. Protect your kids. Educate them. Do your best in the chapter of prevention.
You will find that, as you occupy your mind with possible solutions instead of nightmare scenarios you will worry less. Of course you are much more likely to find a solution, or even avert a situation when you have prepared as much as you could. For example, taking a driving test or exam, or preparing a cooking demo! It is those that are lazy and careless who tend to worry more, and you can see why!
In the same way, if we have prepared ourselves to manage our mind through meditation, we worry less. When we worry, we are trying to control our exterior. We are not controlling our interior. When we regain composure, we will find we do not need to manage anything ‘out there’. We accept all that happens and we stay happy and carefree.
It’s time… to have a day that is free from worry. Know that there is a solution to every problem. There is no lock that does not have a key to it!
© ‘It’s Time…’ by Aruna Ladva, BK Publications London, UK