Peel Off Those Labels
Just how many labels do we wear? No, I am not referring to branded goods! I am talking about the number of identities we accumulate over time. In fact, each and every relationship we have reflects something about our identity back to us through other people. Each identity is telling us something about the kind of person we “perceive” ourselves to be. For example, if I am a daughter or wife, sister or friend, all these are roles I play. This is how I relate to others.
Now we can understand why the sages and saints of India renounce any and all kinds of relationships. The only relationship they adhere to is the one with God, the Supreme. They give up family and home, and even if they have children, they have to let go of them too.
The more relationships I have the more labels I have to feed and sustain.
The more relationships I have the more labels I have to feed and sustain. This can be quite a tiring balancing act. So what to do? One cannot just give them up. It is not a matter of renouncing all my obligations and connections, but of actually transforming situations that may feel like a bondage.
If we can change our consciousness and attitude from the feeling of bondage to relationships, we can make our mind free …
If we can change our consciousness and attitude from the feeling of bondage to relationships, we can make our mind free even whilst engaging with other souls. After all our relationships are supposed to bring us joy and happiness, not stress and strife in life! The saying goes that, “Through self-transformation comes world transformation.”
It is one thing to be in relationship with people, and quite another to be in bondage to them. To be in bondage means to be on an emotional rollercoaster; in dependency; a feeling of not being able to do without; a feeling of loneliness; insecurity and emptiness. A feeling of self-sacrifice, and being dutifully bound etc., which will of course lead to unhappiness.
The art of keeping good relationships is to be present and invest in those connections.
The art of keeping good relationships is to be present and invest in those connections. It is by being available and spending quality time with people that we form deep bonds. When we are mindful to stay alert and pay attention, to be engaged and involved in our relationships, then there is no feeling of leakage of our soul energy, or our soul power being zapped and sapped away. Why? Because we are tune with ourselves and others, and therefore aware when something is not in balance.
To feel light and guilt free. To live from a place of natural self-respect, without any role or identity needing to be defended,
To be in connection without being consumed by the identity means to love and let go. There are no strings of attachment, but an aim to be in respectful relationships. To feel full and complete within my own self, whether that is with or without that relationship. To be happy and joyous constantly. To feel empowered. To feel light and guilt free. To live from a place of natural self-respect, without any role or identity needing to be defended, simply because of the ego and attachment to that label. This is why today so many people have an “identity crisis”, because they do not know who they are, this leads to a lot of confusion and instability. To know myself means I am on my way to happiness.
What helps me is to add a quality to each of my relationships. Here are some I have identified when I am being…
A loyal friend
A kind sister
A dutiful daughter
A compassionate soul
A loving child
A respectful colleague
A studious student
A dependable neighbour
A good citizen
So check for yourself: Who is the one sitting behind the label or role? Who am I? A pure loving light, the one who consciously creates my soul expression through the instrument of the body. Firstly, I have to form a good relationship with my own avatar. The body is my medium, the human is the means by which I the soul, the being, connect with the world through relationships with other souls, and they too are also on their soul journey. Every theatre and movie actor knows that they can be asked to play any role, therefore they should not become attached to any particular role they are playing.
Once we can recognize who we really are, we can make ourselves free from so much sorrow and mental upset. When we know we are not the roles (the labels) we play, we can see ourselves as we truly are as pure living lights, souls living out a conscious experience of the self in this physical world.
It’s Time… to see who we really are once the labels have been peeled off!
© ‘It’s Time…’ by Aruna Ladva, BK Publications London, UK