Comfort and the Comfort Zone
Buddha would say that our suffering comes from our ego and attachments. If we can be honest with ourselves, and look at our lives, we will see a lot of truth in this. Actually, once we can see that it is our own thinking patterns which are causing us discomfort and suffering, we can take the reins of the mind back into our own hands and begin to make changes and break old patterns. Taking responsibility for our own life, our thoughts, feelings, emotions, words, actions and experiences … will bring us freedom.
“Pain is certain, suffering is optional.”
Buddha
If we can change our perspective, we will see that emotional pain is a form of growth. It could be due to attachment to comfort and what is an unwillingness to change. Drama of life, situations, people and our own karma will make us change and learn what we need to. So, either we change our relationship with change … or we suffer! Rigid thinking will bring us sorrow and unhappiness, whilst flexible thinking will enable us to find a way through whatever is the current challenge in life. When we have a solutions mind-set, there are no problems, but simply opportunities for growth and learning.
We need to check what is making us uncomfortable in the first place? Is there really an issue, or am I getting a message from God and the Universe, “HELLO!” that it’s time to change? Sometimes the discomfort is the signal that I have become distracted from my purpose and gone off track without realizing it. Maybe I have become complaisant, and stuck in my comfort zone … everything is OK, but I am not really being stretched or challenged. I have a comfortable life … but deep down I am not truly happy.
“Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.”
Khalil Gibran
It is a bit like going to the gym for a workout, and doing the same old routine. Running on the treadmill … at a slow speed, rowing on that machine … without moving much and not even breaking into a sweat. Realistically there will be no change or health improvement if the weights on that bell bar stay as ounces and are not increased to pounds. In this case I am just fooling myself being happy for becoming a member of the gym but maybe all I do is sit in the sauna … but do I look good in those designer outfits.
We need power to change, and clarity to see what we need to change. These things will also help us to embrace change more easily too.
- Create a big attitudinal shift in the way you are seeing things.
- Accepting change and the need to change something in you.
- Being open to learning.
- Recognizing where your expectations are sitting. What is behind them?
- Checking the self: Is there a willingness to change?
- What are the barriers and blockages to acceptance of being where you are? Look again. Look deeper.
- Where do you think you need to be? Physically and metaphorically.
- Time will make you change if you do not choose to change yourself.
We like the changes we like, the easy ones, but we resist the changes we do not like. Yet, sometimes the “apparent” negative changes, simply because of our unwillingness to change, can actually move us forward in a more positive direction. We may find ourselves in a better place, and certainly with more life experience, and hopefully more wisdom too.
It is all about us improving our relationship with change. We need to develop a positive and non-resistant approach; learning to flow with the all and everything, and being true to ourselves.
It’s Time … to realize that change means growth and renewal.
© ‘It’s Time…’ by Aruna Ladva, BK Publications London, UK
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