Having made your New Year resolutions are you still happy? Or have some of the resolutions deflated with the passing of the days? Real happiness needs to be constant and not just wax and wane like the moon. There needs to be some real purpose, stability and focus in our life for us to experience success and to be happy.
Is the definition of happiness that we are happy when we get what we want? Then given that no one is happy even after getting their aims met, what then? This implies that we are aiming for the wrong things! Perhaps we need to either look more closely at what we are aiming for, or look at our beliefs about happiness.
Work/Do/Try >>> Aim >>> Stress/Tension ===== NOT Happy
Being/Accept/Appreciate >>> Aim >>> Practice/Peace ===== Happy
So, let’s do that first… let’s look at the definition of happiness.
Firstly, in spiritual terms, happiness does not need a reason to exist. The soul in its natural state is in bliss, which is a deep state of happiness. How do we know that? Because whatever is natural will return to its original state. Look at a natural element like water… steam turns to water, ice as it melts returns back to water. So too when all is “natural” and “normal” around us, then the soul returns to its natural state of being… happy.
So, to conclude, happiness is not so much an aim we need to create, but we need to start to eliminate all the things that take us away from happiness. As in the water example, remove the hot and the cold, and the water returns to its natural balance. So too when the soul gets too ‘hot’… too hyper and heated with expectations, passion, anger or desire, we move away from our real state of happiness… When we become too ‘cold’ – depressed and disheartened, then the same applies. Therefore, we need to always keep ourselves in that neutral state. Nothing is good and nothing is bad. It just is… when we add the energy of our attention and emotions to something, the pendulum swings towards more happiness or more sorrow.
This is a perfect story to illustrate the point.
A man asked Lord Buddha: “I want happiness.”
Buddha said: First remove “I” that’s Ego.
Then remove “want”, that’s Desire.
See, now you are left with only “Happiness.”
There does not need to be a ‘reason’ for happiness. When I say: “I am happy because… I can now drive, or I got a new car; because I have a new hair style; because I graduated; because I got married…” What does that imply? That I was not happy before? And if I am happier now, then will that state last or, am I simply waiting for the next hit to make me happy… again! In real deep happiness, there is no ‘because’, there is just being happy. Pure happy. Happy and eternally happy!
To follow this idea further, we lose power the moment we say someone is the reason for our happiness, such as in the case of romantic love. As soon as the cause/object of our happiness goes, so too will go our happiness. So, if the shiny new car got scratched, especially on the first day, well, that will be a roller coaster of emotions, up and then down the next moment! So, it is very important to recognize that superficial happiness, or we could call it human happiness, can be all too fleeting… Soul happiness is deep and unlimited.
Only in deep soul happiness can transformation take place. As Abraham Maslow has shown in the hierarchy of needs, when we are happy then we can consider making shifts and ascending to higher spiritual realms. This applies for the spiritual hierarchy too. First we need enough spiritual power to create a strong foundation, this will help us to go beyond all the physical aspects that pull us and make us unhappy. Then we can aspire to higher spiritual aims!
The way to get there is to constantly be appreciative and be in gratitude. To be positive and thankful. Shed the criticising, the complaining, and the correcting. All this simply takes away from our own happiness. These habits put us in a negative state, far from our original state.
When I am in a happy state, I can think of doing ‘good’ for others. Then good karma naturally kicks in, and I am able to be successful on all fronts… In other words I can put in the effort and I will definitely claim some good results. If I do the same action in a state of sorrow or depression, the thought and action will not match, and so there will not be a synchronicity in thoughts, words and actions. Then I wonder why I do so much and why there are so few results!
Always remember that happiness is our innate treasure, and when something is our precious treasure then we keep it very safe. So do not allow anyone or anything to steal your treasure of happiness from you. Yes, things will happen and people will come. I know some people who have become so very angry over some spilt milk. At least if you are to lose your happiness let it be over something greater than spilt milk!
When I am happy, I am content. Contentment means to be at peace. Then I am not restless or peaceless. Contentment means to be satisfied… I do not want anything different. That means I accept everyone and everything as they are. Can you see… where I am going with this? Yes! There is no conflict! There are no disputes or… misunderstandings. Everything is clear and even if it isn’t, it doesn’t matter. Nothing has been lost! I keep my peace of mind.
When I lose my happiness that becomes a form of punishment for the soul. There is no other punishment than this. Even on the Day of Judgement, there is no God whipping me up, or boiling me in hot oil. I simply lose my happiness. I am dis-connected. I feel guilt and regret, and I feel sad and alone.
Let us learn those lessons now and do not leave until tomorrow what we can do today. And do not leave until today what we can do now! So get happy and get moving.
Happiness is contagious. Try spending an hour with someone unhappy and depressed, it feels like eternity! Then spend a day with a happy person, and a day is not enough! When we are happy, we make others happy, and that creates a happy world.
Change your goals! We are eternal souls and we therefore deserve eternal happiness. Our purpose in life is to be happy, we just have to realize this truth.
It’s Time… to be happy… no matter what… and to get moving with happiness. If happiness is lost, everything is lost.
© ‘It’s Time…’ by Aruna Ladva, BK Publications London, UK