Attached?

Attached?

If the vice of ego gives us the false feeling of security, and the vice of greed gives us the false feeling of contentment, then the vice of attachment gives us the false feeling that we are enough. But we are not, we are still empty.

Attachments are, well, things we are attached to. It could be people or things, foods, ideas and so on. These things I have acquired, chosen, picked out and worked hard to get, are like magnets that pull us towards them and because of their magnetic pull, they begin to control us and begin to define who I am.

We see this with young children at play who live in the world of “I, me and mine”, those attachments are clearly being played out. When we have learnt these behaviours in childhood, then why should it be so different for us in the adult world? In fact because the pattern is quite entrenched in adulthood, our mind becomes blinkered whenever we have an attachment. Because attachment, which is an emotion, makes us blind.

Are attachments beneficial? They are in the sense of being attached to a routine or discipline, this can give us a certain solace. It is like therapy for the soul – nothing new to adapt to, no stress of learning anew and no fear of the unknown. A routine can afford some stability and protective boundaries in life, as long as we are still open to change when necessary, then they can work for us.

I work so hard at trying to hold onto my attachments, that I have
now created the fear of losing them.

It’s an illusion to think that these attachments provide security and an elixir for happy ever after life. I work so hard at trying to hold onto my attachments, that I have now created the fear of losing them. When I see my car, or my watch, I am seeing me – this is not only mine, but it is me. Most attachments, especially ones of comfort and wealth, give us the impression they are good for us; keeping us healthy and improving our well-being, feeding the soul and giving us the feeling, we are abundant. But be wary, because as we rely on those things a lot more for our confidence and self-respect, the soul is becoming dependent and when those things are not there, and we lose them, then we become less in some way. This feeling of lack hurts the soul and we feel the emotional pain of loss.

… we become upset because of attachment – because it was “mine”, if the same
incident occurred to someone else, then we would not be so upset.

For sure we have all had the experience of buying something new, and sitting in the happiness of our purchase. But if our nice new woollen cardigan, or anything else, becomes damaged we become upset. And we become upset because of attachment – because it was “mine”, if the same incident occurred to someone else, then we would not be so upset. As we get older, and our acquisition of things and relationships expand, so too do our attachments.

We justify to ourselves that we need all those “trappings” to feel good. That we work hard for all those attachments, we pay all the taxes and deserve the good things in life. But is more really better? Does more make us any happier? And what is the price we are paying for acquiring such things? It is our health, our relationships, our time and our life, all are passing by. There are many subtle and invaluable things that we cannot ever get back even if we paid billions for them. Most of all we cannot see those souls with whom we had close relationships once they have passed on. We will not bring back our youth, wisdom and innocence; that time will not come again in this lifetime, so it is good to value the important things in life.

If the vice of ego gives us the false feeling of security, and the vice of greed gives us the false feeling of contentment, then the vice of attachment gives us the false feeling that we are enough. But we are not, we are still empty. We want more and more of this euphoric sense of ‘enough’, so we keep attaching ourselves to more and more things. But the problem with that is that those are temporary and perishable. Nothing outside of us is eternal. So, at some point, the illusion will crack.

The more we prop ourselves up with physical objects, the more we are moving away from our real self. All these attachments are weighing the soul down, so obviously the real self, the soul, is no longer visible, it gets hidden. Our identity is no longer that we are powerful and peaceful souls but we get our sense of ‘self’ from that which we are attached to … for the moment and while it lasts.

We have simply forgotten that, “I am enough just as I am.”

We have simply forgotten that, “I am enough just as I am.” We do not really need anyone or anything to complete us. But of course we share a relationship with other people, and things too can help us enjoy and complement our lives. But at the end of the day everything is transitory, not eternal in nature and not spiritual.

In a spiritual context, attachments become a block, hindrance, or handicap that stops us experiencing that ultimate connection with the divine self and God. Our well-deserved attention needs to go on our inner world. As we begin to give energy to every virtue inside of us, we begin to realize how truly rich and abundant we are. It will be our internal resources that will help us to get through the challenges of life. Love, peace, tolerance, patience, resilience and wisdom, these are the virtues that stay with us for many lifetimes when we invest the time and energy to cultivate them. Be attached to the real self that is permanent and everlasting, not anything else.

So there is another way to enjoy life. One that is quite the opposite. One that needs few material objects and trimmings. One in which all that we seek to experience we carry inside us; we just need to make that inner connection.

It’s Time … to check our attachments, and maybe it’s time to say goodbye to some of them.