Love and Let Go
It seems to be a common and immediate human reaction that when we fall in love with someone or something, we need to have it, eat it, own it etc. all for ourselves. Imagine a beautiful flower in the garden. So long as it is there, everyone is seeing and appreciating it, but as soon as it is picked and brought into your living room, not only can it be admired by only a few, but it will also die very quickly.
There seems to be the false notion that the desired object or person will complete us upon the acquisition of it. Imagine falling in love with that so called ‘perfect partner’, or the Louis Vuitton handbag, or a dream idea. The yearning creates a restlessness in the soul and the appetite will not be satiated until the soul has gotten the object of its desire. But does it complete us? Are we content? Is there not then the birth of another desire, and yet another? So, we may feel rewarded at one moment, and the very next moment left with another gaping hole to fill!
This raises the question: Did it truly fulfil its promise of making us whole? Or did it come to deceive us? Was it really love in the first place? Because where there is love there is no pain or struggle. So, what was the quality of attraction that lured us? Was it genuine or false?
There is a saying:
If you love someone, set them free.
If they come back, they’re yours,
and if they don’t, they never were.
There is a lot of truth in this theory. It seems to be a secret law of physics that many of us have not understood which is that when we detach and let go, then all true things come to us.
Learning to recognise whether something is the road to freedom or a trap to deceive us, is the key. It takes a strong sense of discrimination. A clear eye that can discern what is worth pursuing and what needs to be let go of.
Below is a video – watch it and see what message you take from it.
Many times, we continue down the road, not quite knowing when to stop, until the object of our addiction finally kills us. It’s always good to take a step back and reflect on what it is that I am in control of, and what is controlling me. As Rumi was quoted: ‘I am not keeping you from having the things of the world… I am keeping the world from having you.’
We may be smart enough to fulfil all our worldly desires only to eventually realize that we are living in a trap of our own creation. Learning to recognise what is real and what is false is the first step to a free, happy and fulfilling life. Being the master of, and not a slave to our desires means we can be free to enjoy them, and free to let them go. This is the ultimate self-love.
It’s Time… to love… the self!
© ‘It’s Time…’ by Aruna Ladva, BK Publications London, UK